Isolationism, Fear and Addiction

Well, this is a heavy topic, but one that my heart has been led to talk about. Mainly because it is just now that I feel comfortable with where I am at, where the Lord has taken me and how he has taken me there.

My goal has always been to be a great mom. Not just the kind that stays home with here kids, but the kind that interacts, loves and kisses her kids. I want to encourage them, disciple them, train them, etc. But I will share with you what keeps me from all of that.

My computer, my emails, my facebook, my blog. Other things are more important and get in the way. Other things make my heart more selfish and long more for "me" time then for the important things...my children.

I have known this about myself for a long time. So long in fact that the Lord really spoke to my heart many times before about my problem. You see having a large family is great, full of so much fun and surprises, but it also can lead to, for me, fear of being alone. I am a huge people person, so my fear is not having people around me. Besides my children.

So how does my title play into where the Lord is leading me right now...well, when you are a people person and have a little one who nurses and is on a tight schedule come the evening not really allowing me too much time, you fall into a rountine that usually involves the same thing and you can't do much outside of that. When you have little ones who are sick and you miss a few weekends at church, where your family is, you feel a little isolated when you come back. The fear of the unknown.

That one is big. You see we are at a crossroads. The Lord has showed us that we are missing blessings because of the debt we have over our heads. So we are cutting back, I mean really cutting back. To the point of no land line, no internet, and many others. I don't mind it because I know that in the end we are following the Lord's promptings. We can then enjoy the Lord's blessing because we are doing what He has asked of us. But there is fear of not knowing what to do, so much is being taken away, so there is fear.

My addiction to the computer has also brought up the fear and isolationism. You fall into a rut of doing the same thing, you fall into a rut of just going through the motions. The fear of finances. I don't want that fear anymore and am willing to sacrifice all my creature comforts for us to successfully get out of that debt. It may take a few years, but it will be well worth it in the end!

I am excited to see where the Lord is leading us. It won't be easy, but I do see a light at the end of the tunnel, I see the silver lining and it is so much more beautiful without the burdens.

Don't worry I will give warning before I just disconnect.

Just Fun Happenings

Life goes by fast. Blink an eye and my 9 1/2 month old is trying to crawl. My 2 1/2 year old is trying to go potty by herself, and my 5 year old is learning so much more each day!

Life is hectic and I am learning the preciousness of enjoying and savouring each moment. The good ones and the bad ones. The good ones are filled with laughter and love, the bad ones, lessons that are learned and humbling of spirits.

Here are some fun photos we took the past couple of days.

Lauren on our walk to Sabino Canyon. It was so beautiful outside and the sun was shining with a cool breeze. She is growing up so fast. She is so beautiful on the inside and outside.

Hunter and Lauren. Theyare so cute together. They really enjoy playing together. I love them so much.

My hubby and 3 of the girls. This is water run off from the snow melt. It was really high and rushing today. This spot had some beautiful rocks to hike through and there was even a bat on the side of a rock. (Not the one they are sitting on :))

Amidst the desert there is green, lush green. The kind of green that reminds me of living in Colorado - my favorite place.

More lush green. There was such a clean, sweet smell in the air. It was so refreshing.

My hubby and myself, with Emma. We had such a nice walk. We walked 3 miles!

Lauren, Emma and Hunter. They are so cute! I can't wait to have more!

This is what a 15 passenger van looks 1/2 full. :) There are plenty of empty seats for more blessings.

This is what happens to a baby when she is having way too much fun in the bathroom. She was trying to reach for anything she could within eyes sight. It was too funny.

"Look mommy, look." "What are you eating D?"

"Dis mommy, dis."

"Cheeeeze."

Bread pudding before a 2 year old found it and devoured almost 1/4 of it! I couldn't believe how much she loved it! It was so tasty. I will definitely make that one again.

Well, these were just a few pics of a few days in the life of me. Nothing too exciting, but you know what full of love and memories. Tonight a wonderful movie with my hubby and a nice and quiet evening...well, hopefully if the kids will go off to bed. :)

Good night and God bless.

Shepherd Bread

I love making new bread. Sourdough just hasn't worked out for me, so I tried this bread with a biga which is similar to sourdough. Oh my was it so tasty! And so easy. The only thing I would do different is shape it but not in a loaf pan.

Night Before:

1/4 tsp yeast

1 c. warm water

2 c. flour

Cover with plastic wrap and set aside for baking day. If it isn't used in 24 hours, refrigerate.

Baking Day:

Add 1/2 tsp yeast, 2 c. warm water, 1 tbs salt. Mix in 4-5 c. flour (white, wheat, or 1/2 and 1/2). Knewad, place in greased bowl, let rise until double in size, about an hour in warm oven. Shape into 2 loaves and let rise until doubled. Preheat oven to 475- then turn down to 400 once you place bread in oven. Bake 40-45 min. Let rest 10 min, then place on cooling rack.

This is the biga the following morning.

This is the flour and other ingredients being stirred together. My lovely assistant Emma.

This is the dough being placed in a well greased bowl to rise in the oven.

I am sorry I don't have the pic of the fluffy dough, but here it is shaped in the loaf pans. Next time like I said I will just shape them and let them rise on a cookie sheet.

The final product! The crust is crispy and the inside is so chewy and delicious. I will definitely add this to my bread recipes. It doesn't rise fast like a regular bread, so I realy think just shaping it will work out great!

I hope you will try it.

Oh, by the way I strained my 2nd batch of yogurt with a tea cloth and the thicker yogurt was definitely a hit. Now, what to do with all the whey left behind. I will do some research and let you know.

Hope you enjoy.

Change Hurts, but is Oh, So Good!!

I have much to learn. When I think I have learned one thing, the Lord is so gracious in showing me, truly what is left. I am so thankful He doesn't give up on me or grow impatient with me.

I am not a perfect mother, I do not have it all together, and I get frustrated, angry and impatient. I am selfish, greedy and want my way all the time. I am a type A personality and like to be in control. God can drive, but I will hold onto the steering wheel. :)

This is a new season of my life. Learning to let go, learning to give God the complete control. My children, though absolute blessings, are not mine. They are on loan. I am the seed planter, but God is in charge of watering and growing. That is a hard one to let go of.

I am learning to relinquish my control, to have more fun, to relax and just enjoy all the moments. They don't all have to be planned out. I have a 10 year old who is teaching me most of this with the Lord's help. You see, we have been having a lot of disrespect issues and rebellion. It isn't what I wanted for his life or mine, but what we have been given by the Lord. I was ready to go and let him experience public school and live at his dad's. But the Lord graciously showed me that it wasn't part of His plan. He is using Hunter to change me. To grow me. I am so thankful.

I am now seeing Hunter in a new light. His eyes are sparkling and he is smiling. It is really a joy to be working on what the Lord would have me and little by little see the fruit of my change. I read a great quote, "Have a problem with your children, check to see yourself, because more is caught than taught."

Life isn't always easy and God never said it would be, but He did promise to be by our side. He is with me, walking with me.

I pray that if you or someone else is struggling with rebellion, that you would encourage them to seek the Lord, see what changes need to be made, and fervently make those changes. I am so excited to see what the Lord will continue to do in our lives. I truly want to be His servant and vessel.

Have a blessed day.

Hope you like the changes.

Well, after much deliberation it was time for a change. Time for a new profile picture, new wording, the works. So I made some changes and I hope you all like it. Here are a few questions that you can help me answer to make my blog more enjoyable for you.

1.) What do you enjoy the most about my blog?
2.) What topics do you enjoy reading about?

If you can just leave those comments in the comments section I would appreciate it. My goal is to make my blog a really great place to be with all sorts of good stuff to keep you coming back for more. :)

Enjoy the evening.

Step By Step Chores

I think one of the best ways to make a large family successful is by assigning chores to everyone. Everyone 2 and up can definitely pitch in. Even the smallest chore is the biggest help and one less thing for mama to worry about.

In the beginning, I set aside about 15 minutes each afternoon to work with a specific child and chore that they will be working on. I take my "master list" with me so both they and I know what is to be expected. I also take this list and type each one out onto a larger sheet, with squares next to it, laminate it and then it can be their own personal checklist until they are confident with how to do it by heart.

Below is my "master list". I personally work well off of other's ideas, so hopefully my list will help you. I clean my house everyday, little by little, till everything is done by Friday. That way my weekends are free to be a little more flexible with the kids and hubby, just hanging out. It is a nice way for us because 30-45 min. each day is spent cleaning, versus a whole day or working. I will post my cleaning schedule hopefully tomorrow so that way you can see how that works along with my "master list." Feel free to use it and tweak to help you.

God bless.


STEP-BY-STEP CHORE DIRECTIONS

Making Your Bed
1. Take all pillows off of your bed.
2. Put away any items that don’t belong on your bed.
3. Pull up your sheet to the top and smooth out the wrinkles.
4. Straighten your blanket and smooth out the wrinkles.
5. Tuck in any sides that are hanging over the edge.
6. Replace pillows neatly.

Getting Dressed
1. Take off your pajamas in your own room with the door closed.
2. Get dressed with the clothes you have picked out.
3. Put your pajamas away neatly folded in drawer/bucket.
4. After wearing your pajamas for 3 nights, place them in the dirty laundry basket.

Brushing Your Teeth
1. Put toothpaste on your toothbrush.
2. Close the cap neatly and put it away.
3. If there is toothpaste on the cap, please rinse off with warm water and then replace the cap and put it away.
4. Wet your toothbrush.
5. Set timer for 1 minute and brush until the timer goes off.
6. Rinse your mouth and toothbrush.
7. Put away your toothbrush.
8. Rinse any toothpaste out of the sink.

Wiping Down Bathroom Sink and Mirror
1. Take out one wipe from under bathroom sink and wipe down the entire bathroom sink and counter.
2. Throw away wipe.
3. Take out glass cleaner and one paper towel.
4. Spray the glass cleaner on the center of the mirror and wipe clean with paper towel.
5. Throw away paper towel.
6. Put wipes, glass cleaner and paper towels back in basket under sink.

Cleaning Bedroom
1. Pick up everything off the floor and put things in their home.
2. Throw away trash in the kitchen trash can.
3. Put any dirty laundry in the dirty clothes basket.
4. Check under your bed for any items that need to be put away where they belong.
5. Check closet shelf and floor, put items away where they belong.
6. Make sure all clothes are hung up neatly or folded and put away neatly.
7. Take swiffer duster and dust off all furniture, shelves, and blinds in your room.

Cleaning Bathroom
1. Put any dirty laundry in the laundry basket.
2. Put away any other items that do not belong in the bathroom away where they belong.
3. Empty the bathroom trash and replace with another trash bag.
4. Get two washcloths from the laundry room and the Comet spray.
5. Take out shampoo, conditioner, and soap from shower area and place on the bathroom counter.
6. Spray shower with the Comet spray and get one washcloth wet.
7. Wipe down entire inside of the shower and the floor area with the wet washcloth.
8. Use the dry washcloth to dry off the walls and floor of shower.
9. To clean the glass door on the shower make sure to spray Comet on the door.
10. Wash with wet wash cloth until there are bubbles.
11. Then take squeegee and wipe down the door.
12. After the door has been squeegeed, use glass cleaner.
13. Replace the shampoo, condition and soap back in their home.
14. Next move to the toilet.
15. Use a small amount of toilet bowl cleaner in toilet bowl.
16. Take out one wipe from under sink and clean off the top of the toilet and handle.
17. Clean off toilet behind the toilet seat and then the top and underneath the toilet seat.
18. Clean off outside the toilet bowl and down behind the toilet.
19. Get toilet bowl brush and scrub inside the toilet, flush.
20. Make sure to straighten out the rug.
21. Hang up all towels back on the rack and hook neatly.
22. Next move to the sink.
23. Take out one wipe from under the sink and clean off entire sink area and counter.
24. Take out glass spray and spray the mirror one time in the middle and one time on medicine cabinet.
25. Take out two paper towels and wipe down mirrors.
26. Take paper towels and wipe down sink faucet.
27. Throw paper towel and wipe away in the kitchen trash.

Cleaning Library
1. Pick up all books off the floor.
2. Put all books neatly back on the shelf.
3. Put all push toys against the wall.
4. Put ottoman back up against the wall.
5. Put any toys back in their homes.
6. Get step ladder from laundry room.
7. Dust off all the bookshelves.
8. Dust off blinds.

Cleaning Front Entry/Living Room
1. Take swiffer and dust off the entire bench. Starting at the top, moving the LOVE letters and baskets.
2. Take off the runner and pillows and dust off the bench.
3. Replace the runner and pillows.
4. Take two paper towels and glass cleaner.
5. Clean the windows on each side of the door.
6. Throw paper towels away in kitchen trash and put glass cleaner away.
7. Take a washcloth from laundry room.
8. Get washcloth damp and wipe down the tv stand and all the shelves.
9. With damp washcloth wipe down all components of the tv.
10. Put all the tv remotes and Wii remotes in the drawer.
11. With damp washcloth wipe down the front of the fireplace.
12. Put washcloth in the laundry basket
13. Get three paper towels and glass cleaner.
14. Wipe down each window.
15. Throw paper towels away in kitchen trash.
16. Get another three paper towels and move to kitchen area.
17. Spray glass sliding door with three quirts on each side and clean window.
18. Spray smaller windows with one squirt and clean window.
19. Spray the big window in the middle with four squirts of glass cleaner and clean window.
20. Throw paper towels away in kitchen trash and put glass cleaner away.

Cleaning Kitchen
1. Take items that do not belong in kitchen and put away in their homes.
2. Put dishes into dishwasher.
3. Take green spray and spray one squirt in each side of the kitchen sink. Wipe out with one paper towel.
4. Take green spray and spray on counters and stove top.
5. Wipe down with three paper towels.
6. Take green spray and spray one spray on the dishwasher front, oven front and refrigerator front. Wipe down with paper towels from counter.
7. Throw paper towels away in kitchen trash and take two new paper towels.
8. Take green spray and spray five sprays on the kitchen table.
9. Wipe down kitchen table with paper towels and throw away in kitchen trash.
10. Push in all chairs around the table.
11. Straighten out kitchen rug.
12. Hang up kitchen towel on oven rack.


Clearing Off Kitchen Table
1. Take all refrigerator items and place back in the refrigerator.
2. Take all plates and scrape into the kitchen trash.
3. Place plate into the kitchen sink.
4. Take all cups and place them on the counter to be used the rest of the day.
5. Take any napkins and trash and throw them into the kitchen trash.
6. Get a washcloth from the laundry room.
7. Get washcloth damp and wipe down kitchen table crumbs onto a plate.
8. Rinse out washcloth.
9. Wipe down kitchen table.
10. Push in all kitchen chairs.

Wiping Down Kitchen Counters
1. Get washcloth from laundry room.
2. Get washcloth wet and wring out.
3. Wipe down all kitchen counters, moving items and replacing them.
4. Rinse out washcloth and hang on hook under sink.
5. Hang up kitchen towel on oven rack.

Oil All Cabinets
1. Get a washcloth from laundry room
2. Get the pledge spray from the laundry room cleaning supplies.
3. Go into girl’s bathroom.
4. Spray one spray of pledge on each cabinet door.
5. Wipe down.
6. Take washcloth and wipe down drawers and side of cabinet.
7. Go into boy’s bathroom.
8. Spray one spray of pledge on each cabinet door.
9. Wipe down.
10. Take washcloth and wipe down drawers and side of cabinet.
11. Go into parent’s bathroom.
12. Spray one spray of pledge one each cabinet door.
13. Wipe down
14. Take washcloth and wipe down drawers.
15. Go into kitchen.
16. Spray one spray of pledge on each cabinet door on the bottom cabinets.
17. Wipe down.
18. Take washcloth and wipe down drawers and side of cabinet.
19. Go to laundry room and get the step ladder.
20. Use step ladder to get the top cabinets.
21. Spray one spray of pledge on each cabinet door.
22. Wipe down.
23. Put pledge away in laundry room cleaning supplies.
24. Put washcloth into laundry basket.

Clean Out Van
1. Take out all toys, jackets, shoes, etc. and place them in the appropriate bedroom.
2. Take out all trash, napkins, water bottles, etc. and put them in the trash can.
3. Empty out all cup holders and put in appropriate place, trash or in a bedroom.
4. Get a washcloth from laundry room.
5. Get the washcloth damp and wipe down the dash and all cup holders with washcloth.
6. If needed, get shop vac to vacuum out.

Home Made Yogurt...Delicious!

Home Made Yogurt

So easy and so delicious!

Here is the recipe first:

8 cups of whole milk

1/2 c. of good plain yogurt

Place the 8 cups of whole milk in a crock pot on low heat for 2.5 hours. Shut heat off and leave alone for 3 hours. After the 3 hours put in the good plain yogurt (once you have made some you can use 1/2 cup of your own yogurt as the starter), mix gently, leave for 7-8 hours. I usually start it in the morning and by 9-10:00pm I put it in the containers and refrigerate for the morning.

Milk getting all warm and delicious for the starter.

The milk I used, you can use any kind, but sometimes it is nice to know.

Cutting up fresh strawberries for the yogurt. You can use frozen, but these were on sale and so red and ripe, I couldn't refuse.

Mmmmm. Strawberries.

All cut up waiting for their sugar bath.

The sugar...I added a little more than I would because personally I am not a fan of sour plain yogurt, so to sweeten it up a bit I added a little more sugar.

This morning as I was making parfaits. Mmmm.

And here is the finished product. Now I would have shown you what I looked like eating it, however, I didn't really want to embarass myself with the drippings down the face. But it was absolutely delicious and I will definitely be making this more often in our home. I made 1/2 gallon of yogurt for about $1.50. That doesn't include the strawberries or any other fresh fruit or the granola. But for yogurt that is a great deal, especially for a large family that loves yogurt.

I will be hopefully posting our home made bread tomorrow. Later on this week I will post our home school schedule. I get a lot of requests on how we do it, especially with little ones on our feet, and I will share how it works for us.

Have a blessed day!

Best French Bread Ever!!

Here is the recipe first:

2 1/2 c. flour

1 c. warm water

1 tblsp yeast

1 tblsp sugar

1 tsp salt

The secret to really great bread is making sure it has a safe place to rise. So I always preheat my oven to 200 with a pan of water and then turn it off.

So here are all the ingredients getting ready to get yummy. Remember to proof your yeast by placing the warm water, sugar and yeast together in a cup, if the yeast is frothy then you know it is ready, if it isn't, well, try again using warmer water, or your yeast might be old.

Once the mixture has been kneaded. I usually just place it in the same bowl with a quick spray of Pam around the bowl.

Cover it with a damp towel and in the oven it goes...see my pan of water? It works wonders. Also, for this recipe, keep it in the oven even while baking, it will make the crust extra crispy and the inside just delicious and chewy.

Once the bread has risen. I didn't get to take a picture of my loaves rising, however, here is another secret. I use a large cookie sheet and then my small loaf pans in the middle between them to help keep the shape of a loaf. Otherwise you might end up with misshapen loaves. Score the tops with 1/4" diagnal slits.

So this is the finished product, ready to be devoured with dinner. Tonight home made bolognase with garlic cheese bread. It will be delicious.

Also, I always double this recipe and make 2 loaves. If I start it at 3:30pm it is ready by about 5:30pm to eat. Just to give you an idea as to how easy it is.

I hope you enjoy making it.

Vacation Pictures

Even though there was sickness abounding we did a few opportunities to get out. So here are a few of them!

Bret and the kids playing miniature golf. It was fun, a little cool out and windy, but the sunshine sure felt great.

My darling husband. He is so handsome. He truly is my gift from the Lord.


My little D, always posing for pictures, but then she wants to see them. :)

Lauren in the pool. She loves sitting in the jacuzzi. The warmth and bubbles. Matches her personality perfectly.

Little Mady eating her cheerios. Man since she has discovered "real" food she loves it!

My husband and I dressed up and we even had a place to go. They had 2 formal nights on the ship and it was fun getting dressed up.

All the kiddos. This was on that same formal night. It was so much fun. I love looking at all the smiles. There are always happy memories to be had.

Little Mady all by herself. She just makes my heart melt. Whether I am kissing her neck, cheeks, or feet, I can't get enough.

By the way, she just started getting up on all 4's and rocking, way too cute.

Little D, always posing. You know what she is always happy and smiling. The only time we ever have problems is when she is just tired. She is a joy.


Overall the trip does have some finer points. These pics are just a few of them. I love being with my kids and taking them everywhere. I feel that we are a loving testimony of God's grace. People find children a burden, yet we are always with all 5 of ours, it isn't always easy, but we do make it work. I want people to see them as the amazing blessings that they are, not burdens.

God bless.

(Hopefully tomorrow I will have my home made yogurt up in pics for you to see, along with the recipe.) - it will be delicious.

Vacation Update

Okay, so this post may not be exciting, but our vacation was not fun at all. Well, maybe just dinner, where I got to sit and eat delicious meals and have coffee with my dessert every night!! So here is the short version:

Day 1 - Bret got food poisoning, throwing up. Finally got on boat, and he got quarantined because they didn't want it to spread.

Day 2 - Bret was confined to room, he was so sleepy from all the meds that he missed most of the day and I just bought him food. 5pm he was able to join us for dinner.

Day 3 - 5:15am Lauren throwing up. At this point I have seen my share of vomit. :) She slept most of the day and ate a little bit.

Day 4 - Lauren feeling a little better, but really tired. We went off to a port and enjoyed a cold, windy day on the beach, by the night she was still feeling sick.

Day 5 - Lauren still sick, cried out to the Lord and he answered, she had motion sickness, so we got her some bands and within 20 min was feeling better.

Day 6 - Hunter got sick. He slept most of the day eating a little.

Day 7 - Hunter still sick, took some motion sickness pills and slept all day, not eating too much.

Day 8 - We left the ship, everyone feeling okay, a 10 hour drive home and finally we are here.

Today has been a very slow day getting back into our routine. I think that is the hardest part. The Lord is showing me much. It is hard working on your faults and then being shown all your faults constantly. But I am willing to work at it and learn, I just hope I learn it soon. It has been 9 days of throwing up from someone and the whining is a little much for me personally. So we will see where the Lord will take me. For now I am trying to find joy in my season right now and focusing on all the things that I am thankful for. There is much, praise the Lord. My thankful list is much longer than my griping list.

This week I will post pictures of the cruise and I will also be sharing some of my favorite recipes, including my bread recipe...mmm. We love making our home made bread and it turns out delicious every time. So check back. Blessings to you all.

Vacation

Well, we are almost done packing and finishing up for our trip. We leave Saturday for Los Angeles, CA for our Mexican Riviera Cruise. We are so excited! I will have much to blog and many pictures when we arrive back in 8 days. Have a blessed time.

Sewing 101

I LOVE sewing. I wish I could spend all day doing it, but unfortunately, life beckons me and I don't have as much time as I would like. However, as one seamstress want to be, I would like to share with you one of my secrets to sewing well. Besides actually sewing, but youtube.com. I will say that has been amazing. Type in what you are looking for and boom, there is a small video to show you how. I have been making the girls matching dresses for our upcoming cruise and I learned to gather stitch right there on the computer. I watched, when went out and did it and have mastered it. Amazing!! You can learn many different things on youtube.com. So besides wasting time watching silly videos, you can learn a new skill. I am all about the new skills. Especially if my husband and family benefit.

So as one mama at home to another mama, try it, you can learn so much and then teach your children. If you are careful enough you could even have your younger girls watch and it can be for home ec... The possibilities are endless.

Blessings.

Happy Birthday to My Husband!!

My husband's birthday is tomorrow. I am posting today because we are also leaving for a cruise on Saturday morning. So packing for all 7 of us and still wanting to make 6 dresses, well, let me just say that we are busy. That doesn't even include school, chores, and laundry, oh and the last minute runs out and about.

So, for my husband on this grand day, I will enjoy the moments all a little more deeper. My heart has molded to his, and we are truly soul mates. Knowing what we are thinking and finishing each others sentences. Holding hands more, kissing more and hugging more. I couldn't imagine a better man being married to.

I am truly so blessed in so many ways, but most of all thankful to a man who persued me till no end, who never gave up on me, who loved me even when I was a mess, tattered and torn. Who loved me even when I felt, "who could love me." He waited patiently, loved me and renewed me. God knew from the beginning that he would be it for me. The man I am to spend the rest of my life with.

I would not have what I have today if it wasn't for the Lord and my husband's sweet obedience to just love me. He has let me flourish and shine, my creativity burst forth because of him. I am ever so thankful for the day that my husband was born, the day his story began.

To my beloved and cherished husband may this day be full of many blessings.

I LOVE YOU!