Starting Over

Have you ever messed up, realized it, sulked over it, and then tried to start over. To me right now that is my parenting journey. Life hasn't been easy. Dealing with Hunter going back and forth between two homes has never been my ideal, and it hasn't been easy. Dealing with other adults who communicate differently and even worship differently.

I am learning a lot about the person I have become and the many changes I need to make, to be there for my kids, to have their hearts. It won't be an easy journey, changing 33 years of me, but I believe that my motivation is great and my God is greater.

You see, I have never been a play, fun mom. I have a lot of work to do. Character training, discipline, cleaning, cooking, changing diapers, schooling, etc. So fun isn't always my priority. Do we laugh and such, but mom isn't always involved. The kids always have fun things to do. But now I am learning that I need to change myself to gain their hearts and keep their hearts. For my happiness and for their souls. Being a mom is hard work, home schooling is hard work. So I am going to change.

So today to start, we went for a walk, we made peanut butter playdough and laughed. I didn't make a big fuss over the little things, I let them go and smiled when discipline needed to happen. It will always be baby steps right now as I retrain myself. I will keep you updated as I go. May you be encouraged to make changes where you need. :)