Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Burdens

I believe what the Bible says, that God's commands are not burdensome. When we feel led to do something and it becomes a heavy burden, or there is no joy in it,then I don't believe I was called to do it. I understand that there are certain things in life that we need to learn to deal with. For me that is my perfection and not being very flexible. I love a clean house, but now with a rampant 2 year old who truly is somedays more than I can handle, I don't get that too often. I have little messes and sometime giant messes in every single room in the house!! So, for me I understand that I need to learn meekness, patience, and flexibility.

I am learning so much and feel that I have placed many burdens on myself that the Lord Himself did not place there. For me I tend to be insecure. In many areas. Being a great Christian for example. Looking at someone who looks godly makes me question my own godliness. Shame on me for not accepting God's grace as being sufficient. My own personal style and likes/dislikes can truly be something that helps someone else see Christ in my life.

There are so many people in my circle who are all different. Different convictions, different ideals, and such. That is what makes them great. It is my own fault if I feel pressured to do something just because someone else does. I need to get down on my knees and really pray earnestly to find God's will.

Today and lately I feel lost and alone. Trying to figure out where I am, I lost myself amidst all my girls. That is easy to do. I believe I am allowed to be a vibrant, crazy, athletic woman, and now if I can get those other burdens that I have allowed to fall off and see the woman that the Lord made me to be. And to accept them. I think I will find her. I am working on it. :)

Have a blessed day.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

How Long is too Long...

It has been way too long. Being a mom of 5 sure is busy. Hunter doesn't live with us anymore, so it is the girls that keep this mama way busy. Katie is almost 4 months old and is the light of our lives. She is amazing, just like all the other girls are.

Life is moving fast and things are changing. For one and the biggest, we are thinking that Katie might be the last one. I think this is the hardest decsion we are facing and want it to Biblical. So many I know in our circle just want to keep having babies because they feel that is where God has led them. At one point I would have agreed, but right now I am changing my mind. I want to know my girls, enoy each and every moment of them. I want to know my husband and enjoy all of him as well. We are full and happy. So here we are. We wonder if for us that the idea of having more is Biblical or is it a man made mandate. I don't know. My knees are getting a workout as we pray for leading.

Hunter is doing awesome at his dad's and though I miss his face, I know he is happy. I can't believe he will be 12 in October and he is starting 6th grade! I cannot believe how time flies.

Life is so good, busy and I am ready for the next season of life. No more car seats, strollers, blankets, etc. But ready to go out for tea, have our toes done and get coffee. Get our hair done and spend the day shopping. That is what I am really looking forward to.

Well, I will definitely post pics in the next day or so, and lots of them to keep everyone up to date. Now that we are on a pretty normal schedule, I know it will change, but right now I am enjoying it. I am looking forward to spilling my guts more often.

Have a totally blessed day.

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